Hoodies may soon be illegal in Oklahoma

A state senator from Oklahoma is proposing an amendment that could make it illegal to wear articles of clothing that cover a person’s face.  This includes hoodies… Actually, unless you’re running around in a Batman costume, hoodies are almost the only article of clothing that this law would affect that I can think of.  The amendment would make it illegal to hide someone’s identity in public.  Offenders could be fined up to five hundred dollars.

The author of this bill, and possibly soon one of the first members of an actual fashion police, is RepublicanSenator Don Barrington.  His reasoning behind this amendment of his is almost flawless.

“Oklahoma businesses want state leaders to be responsive to their safety concerns, and this is one way we can provide protection.”

Yes, because slapping a $500 fine on someone wearing a hoodie in public will definitely make Oklahoma a safer place!  Never mind the fact that it might just be cold outside!

Interestingly enough, suspicion of people in hoodies is nothing new to the biggest county of Texas.  According to an existing law, “It’s already illegal to wear such clothing during the commission of a crime.”

Again, this makes total sense.  If someone is already breaking the law they’ll totally pay attention to the law that bans them from disguising themselves!

Fortunately for that small percentage of people who would simply ignore a law as stupid as this, there are several exceptions to the proposed amendment.

It would not apply to people dressing up for Halloween, masquerade parties or parades.

People required to cover their faces because of religious beliefs would also be exempt.

The proposal adds that people who have to cover their faces for safety or medical purposes, or for protection from the weather would also be exempt.

So, when all is said and done, this senator probably just wanted to look like he was doing something to earn his paycheck, and probably killed a few trees-worth of paper to do so.  Rest easy, Oklahoma!  Your state government is hard at work making sure your horizon-to-horizon fields of nothing are safe from people in hoodies… so long as they don’t claim any of the many exceptions to the law.