Utah Man – Vote For Me Or Face God’s Judgement

A Utah business man is making an appeal to voters that is sure to make him stand out. It has that tinge of narcissism that truly successful politicians need, the dire warning that the world will end if he isn’t in charge, and that it also isn’t up to the voting population of Utah. A higher power has chosen him to lead. (Very Biblical, isn’t it?)

“Super” Dell Schanze is running for governor of Utah on the Independent American Party ticket. In an appeal to voters, he said that people need to vote for him of face the judgement of God almighty!

KUTV reports: “RIGHTEOUSNESS can solve every problem in the world. God made a promise ‘as ye keep my commandments ye shall prosper in the land.’ The vast majority in our state are against murdering unborn children. You are against perversion and perversion of marriage. You are against more encroachment on your 2nd Amendment rights. The voice of the people and the constitution are being utterly mocked!!! Vote SUPERDELL Schanze or face the judgments of God. If even one single state can return to freedom and the constitution the entire world would flow unto it. Your honor rests on your vote.”

That’s right, any Utah residents reading this, it’s God’s will that you vote for a man who’s claim to fame are commercials like these:

Also, if you don’t vote for him, you will almost definitely be struck down by lightning. You honor (and life) depends on it!

I remember reading my Bible in Sunday school and learning about how Jesus talked a lot about freedom, the constitution, and the importance of voting for the Independent American Party. What’s that? That isn’t anywhere in the Bible? *checks Bible* Oh, strange. I guess it’s probably in the Book of Mormon, then.

Whether or not it is God’s will that a man with a ’90s hairdo and the name “Super Dell” should govern the state of Utah remains to be seen. However, it’s kind of hard to tell who’s truly been chosen when every politician claims the End Times will begin if they aren’t elected.



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